


Never let me go

by Rainchen



Category: The Greatest Showman (2017)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, F/M, I wrote this with my sickness addled brain, M/M, More tags to be added, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 16:03:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13999677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainchen/pseuds/Rainchen
Summary: A/B/O - Alternate Universe, after the movie:Phillip has been hiding a secret from the whole Circus Family and it threatens his relationship with Anne, PT and his found family. Will Love take it's course or will it all fall apart?





	Never let me go

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sick af right now and I've been wondering why the fuck I'd write a fanfic. I'm generally someone who almost never writes, so if this makes little to no sense I apologize beforehand since my brain sometimes moves too fast for what I'm writing and I think the general plot is moving to fast and I've tried going back and fixing it but idk it's not working :D

When Phillip first saw PT Barnum he was impressed with the Aura of this Alpha, he seemed powerful but not overly menacing or in simple words: he didn’t see any of the usual Alpha Posturing. He was a devoted husband and father, doting on both children and his wife.  
Strangely enough Charity Barnum was a Beta, which was practically unheard of in the higher circles the Carlyles moved.  
It was always either a Beta/Beta or an Alpha/Omega Pair that led the noble families. Alphas and Omegas where getting rarer so most pairs consisted of Betas nowadays, but having an Alpha in the family was of course another increase in status.  
Although of course having only an Omega child was frowned upon as well, so no one should ever know that the Carlyles, who where a Beta/Beta Pair to begin with, only had managed to get one meager Omega child.

“No Child of mine will ever be an Omega, do you hear me Phillip! You are an Alpha, this pesky Omega thing is just a phase, you are an abomination even among your peers!”, the words of his father echoing in Phillips head, when he came to him when he presented.  
Phillip was taught from the beginning how to posture like an Alpha, how to hide his scent, how to suppress his heat and how to live among Nobility and the High Life of New York without giving away his Omega status.

“Shoulders square, move around the place like you own it. Nothing can stop you, you’re an alpha. The whole world will kneel before you with just one look”, his best friend during childhood had said, who had the fortune of presenting as an Alpha. They had fooled around before both were moved off to different boarding schools. But he had taught Phillip a lot of how to move and how to behave as an Alpha. It became a mantra that Phillip would always repeat in his head.

But just one meeting with Phineas Taylor Barnum already threatened to break this walls. When they had talked after his play, Phillip had been already completely drunk and out of his mind, but he could feel his whole body heating up with just the proximity of Barnum.  
Hours later he was laying in his bed and still felt his gut tingling and his whole body yearning the touch of an Alpha he could never have.

“You shall never take an Alpha to bed, do you understand this? The Carlyle Name will not be dragged through the mud because of you, an abomination. You should have been an Alpha, we did everything we could but look at you, pathetic little thing! If you get pregnant I will personally kill the child right before your eyes!”

Sleep didn’t come easy that night, with nightmares about what his father had done to him and would do if he ever found out what thoughts his son had about one certain Ringmaster of Barnum’s Circus.

And then, when Barnum practically serenaded him in that Bar, to come join the Circus, he fell in love. 

No one could ever know why Phillip had decided to join the Circus, which is why he immediately tried to latch onto Anne Wheeler. He was mesmerized by her, an Omega who didn’t let her biology hold her back, who did daring and gravity defying acts and let nothing stop her from achieving her dream. Oh how Phillip wished he could do the same.

She of course was under the impression that Phillip was an Alpha so it was kind of perfect to continue his spiel of hiding his true status. It didn’t exactly sit well with Phillip to use Anne like this but he knew, he could never let his attraction to Barnum show. They would throw him out of the only place he could call home with no bitter taste in his mouth.  
The Circus became just that, his home, his family and his everything. After the fire, nothing had changed except for saying good bye to the Barnums. PT was almost only seen during the weekends, visiting with wife and children. Phillip led with a firm but gentle hand and the Circus took to their new Ringmaster with little fuzz.

 

But one evening a few months after the Fire, Anne came to him and wanted to talk about her biannual heat.  
“I will not be able to perform during that week, of course. I think it would be best if you talked with Barnum about him taking over Ringmaster duties during that time also.”, Anne had opened the conversation with.

“Why? Anne… are you asking..?”, Phillip was at a loss of words. His mind racing, he couldn’t spend the heat with Anne! 

Oh god, why did he ever start anything like this. Phillip was slowly spinning into a full blown Panic attack. His secret would come out this way! An omega could never pose for an Alpha when it came to sex. Omegas had small cocks, not a big knot to satisfy the deep craving an Omega would develop during their heat. How could he possibly accept this without either losing Anne or his whole circus family if his secret came out!  
“-lip! Phillip! Calm down, why are you panicking!”, when Phillip came back to his senses Anne was so close to him. Also with a slight panic in her eyes.

“I can’t spend your heat with you Anne!”, Phillip finally managed to spit out. It seemed as if time had frozen. Both of them didn’t move and they were at a loss of words.  
“Why?”, Anne finally broke the silence that had settled around them like a vice. 

“Anne.. I’m… I have been lying to you.”, it felt like the world was on his shoulders when Phillip said these words. “I am also an Omega”  
Anne’s eyes looked like they were soon popping out of her eye sockets. Phillip was already preparing for an onslaught, he had had nightmares about this moment so often, and now it would become true. He would get thrown out of the circus, would have to go back to his parents, lead a life he now abhorred again, getting back into his cage when he had finally managed to break free.

But Anne, as always surprised him. While she seemed shell shocked, she let out a long breath and then said: “I had suspected something along those lines. You always seemed to play the alpha posturing. When Barnum is here, you always were much more like an Omega than an alpha. Also sorry to say, but you’re tiny” And with that both of them started to let out a small giggle.

“But.. don’t you have heats as well?”, were Anne’s next words after they stopped laughing. “I do, but I’ve been taught how to suppress them since I’ve presented.” – “Phillip, that can’t be healthy! You… how have you managed for so long! Oh god, why did you even do this”, Anne seemed so exasperated for his sake that Phillip almost started to cry right then and there. He had never had people who honestly cared about him.  
And another surprising thing happened, Anne hugged him. That when the tears started to fall from Phillips eyes without anything stopping it anymore. “Anne… it’s been so hard.”, was all he managed to let out.

Anne held him through his sobbing and crying and helped him let it all out. “It’s okay Phillip. You don’t have to hide this anymore. No one here will think bad about you if you come out as an omega.”, was her mantra.  
After what felt like an eternity Phillip finally reeled in his emotions and the tears stopped. He felt strangely like the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. “But … I can’t be a ringmaster if I’m an omega.”, he said in a small voice. 

“Phillip, this is Barnum’s Circus, we’re a family. Have we ever let society norms hold us back?”, Anne answered with a small smile. “You can be anything you want here. No one will judge you, I’m sure. But only if you feel ready to tell everyone this. I don’t want to force you to come out of hiding. I just think it would help you, it must’ve been horrible to hide for all your life”  
Phillip considered it for a minute, could he live with the whole world knowing his shameful secret? And he found.. that he probably could. This Circus had changed his life for the better and they all trusted him as a Ringmaster and now it was time for him to trust them with his secret.  
But he didn’t want to tell them this right away. “Anne… please let me have this secret a little longer. I’ve been raised to hide my status. I’ve never known another life. How am I even supposed to life as an omega. I know nothing about it.”, he said desperately.

“Well, you can’t continue how you are now also Phillip. This is going to destroy you! It’s a miracle you haven’t already died. Suppressing ones heat is one of the hardest things to do for an omega and it should only be done when an Omega is in a lot of stress and the heat would only further damage ones body.  
Your body has lived in a constant panic mode for years to be able to not have any heats!”, Anne seemed so exasperated for his sake. Prepared to help him and that even though he had lied to her so long. Tears almost spilled from Phillips eyes again at these thoughts. How could she still be so fiercely protective of him after he had lied for so long.

“Anne… I just don’t know how to live like an Omega. I’ve never been shown”, he said in a small voice. 

“But would you like to live like an Omega is the question, Phillip Carlyle. There is nothing to be ashamed of as an Omega.”, Anne said and looked him deeply in the eyes. “I can help you, but only if you want to”

And then, for a long time none of them said anything. 

“Will you really help me Anne? I don’t want to hide, but how am I supposed to come out of this”, Phillip said with a sigh. 

“You know, an omega’s heat can induce the heat of another omega. When my heat gets here… you should help me and we can have a heat together. This way I can help you and you can help me. Two omega’s together can help soothe each other. It would be easier on both of us. And it would finally relieve your body.”, she continued on. 

Phillip pondered on this. It seemed reasonably good, too good for someone like him. But he could finally live his life to the fullest.  
He had always wondered what a heat felt like, and his whole body ached every single day, because he denied it of everything remotely omega related.

“Okay Anne, let’s do this.”, he said and sighed. “But how do I tell them?” – “You don’t have to. I’m sure you can let your true self out and they will still accept it. Just show who you really are and they will react to that. This way you can slowly transition into being a true omega without hiding behind your Alpha personality.”, Anne seemed to have it all thought out for him.

“Well… if you say so. From today on, I will try to let go of my shell.. of my cage…”, Phillip answered and they hugged each other again. 

Phillip would lay awake the whole night, pondering how this would change his life and his relationships to people. Especially how Barnum would react to the news, would he hate him? Would he get thrown out and the old Ringmaster would take over again? 

He had lied to him as much as he had lied to everyone else so it would be understandable if he’d get thrown out but on the other hand he had always thought of PT Barnum to be a kindhearted man, who he had lo and behold fell in love with, even though Phillip would deny this with every breath of his. He only ever let himself think about Phineas this way when complete darkness surrounded him and he could let his thoughts wander without fearing any repercussions from anyone.

The time moved on from then, no one changed their behavior towards Phillip and he started to relax and show more of his omega side. He didn’t have to force himself to behave like an alpha all the time, but still took on his Alpha “focus” when he took the Circus Ring as Ringmaster.

Barnum hadn’t been around the Circus for a few weeks, but he did come for Anne’s heat week, since Phillip had written him a letter how he’d like to help Anne through her heat.  
While another omega couldn’t satisfy the deep ache for an Alpha during a heat, it could certainly help soothe the other omega and that was definitely what Phillip planned on doing. Anne had given him so much and it was time for him to give something back.  
When Phillip and Anne went to gather the Barnum’s from the Train Station a few days before Anne’s heat was scheduled to start, the tall Alpha, his family trailing behind him, approached them with a big smile on his face, that instantly had Phillip gasping for air. He had forgotten how much his body reacted to this man.

PT hugged Anne and gave Phillip a shoulder pat. “I hear congratulations are in order? Helping someone through their heat is a big responsibility. I hope we can hear wedding bells soon!”, he said, still with a big smile on his face and Phillip wanted to punch something, PT or himself, he wasn’t so sure which one of them he’d like to punch more.

Anne got the men’s attention with a cough and Phillip saw a mischievous twinkle in her eyes encouraging him to say what he had planned out. He had written a whole speech in his head but nothing of that would come out now.

“I’m an omega”, he said plainly instead.

 

With these words everything stopped around them. PT who was in the process of giving Phillip another shoulder pat, had his hand raised in midair. “What?”, he finally brought out, it sounded like nothing more than a breath.

“Please, let’s not discuss this here.”, Phillip finally managed to say.  
Charity Barnum didn’t seem faced by her husbands reaction, since the tall alpha still made googly eyes at Phillip, seemingly not being able to handle the new information and went ahead to Phillip and gave him a hug.

“I am happy that you trust us enough with this, Phillip”, she said and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Caroline and Helen didn’t seem to realize what was going on exactly but came up to Phillip anyway, excited to show him the new things their parents had gotten them and to hug and cuddle with him. 

They had always liked that and PT thought, in hindsight that should’ve been a big sign since Caroline and Helen usually were very shy when talking to alphas, but omegas… Omegas were known for their nurturing and caring behavior.

PT finally managed to gather his thoughts and then he went to hug Phillip. Deeply inhaling his scent, and that sealed the deal. It was pure omega, sweet with a hint of spice and the expensive aftershave Phillip used. It was kind of intoxicating. He had a hard time separating again but a small cough from his wife brought him back to reality.

 

The travel to the Circus was almost silent, with only Phillip interacting with Helen and Caroline. Charity had her eyes trained on her husband, who was in turn watching Phillip intently and like he had been enchanted. 

Charity chuckled when she saw the way Phineas looked. Kind of shell shocked and his eyes trained on Phillip the whole time. Anne, who sat across from her also had a smile on her face and both women shared a look.  
Who was she kidding, her husband had been enchanted by Phillip since he saw him the first time and had to get him for his circus, but now he had finally sorted through his feelings it seems. She had known what would be coming that night when he first brought Phillip to the circus.  
Had seen the way Phineas had looked at the other man, how it matched the looks he had given her, how he ran into a burning building to save Phillip.

She couldn’t even be upset about it because she liked Phillip and she knew that this was never the plan or that it was no evil intent from any side but she would have to talk to her husband when they arrived at the Circus. She would not stand in their way.

When the coach finally came to a halt and everyone got out, it seemed to Phineas like an eternity had passed.  
He was so entranced by how Phillip had played with his daughters. He saw the man in a whole new light and he wasn’t sure how to move on from now. He didn’t want to misstep so he fell back when Caroline and Helen dragged Phillip into the Tent and Anne followed after them, giving the Barnums privacy.

Charity looked at him with a little twinkle in her eye. Phineas was once again taken in by the mesmerizing woman before him.

“Phin, what do you think about Phillip?” she asked plainly. 

“Well, he’s a fine young man and I would’ve never expected him to be an omega. But good for him that he trusts us enough to come out of his shell.”, he answered truthfully.  
“I’ve honestly never felt this way for someone as I seem for him. But Charity… I’d never leave you and the kids for him. He has Anne, why would he even want an Alpha like me” 

“I knew this day would come someday. Alphas and Betas are not meant to be together like we’ve been, Phin. And I know you love me, and I love you but I have always seen the way you’ve looked at him. And I can’t even be mad at you.  
Phillip is a brilliant young man and I wish for nothing more in my life than for you to be happy Phin. Go talk to him, I think you’d be surprised to find out about his feelings.”, Charity answered and hugged her husband.  
“I won’t stand in your way. I love you Phin, but more than anything I want you to live a happy life and I could use the help in railing in your crazy ideas.”

Phineas looked at this goddess of a woman standing before him. 

“You can’t mean this Charity. What about our marriage and the kids? I don’t want to leave you behind” 

“Well then, we don’t have to get a divorce right away. I know that you’d never let us down. But I also do not want to trap you and have you lock away feelings you have. I’d never do that to you. My parents have shown me what becomes of people who don’t break free of their cages and I’d never want to become a cage for you.  
You should be happy with the way you life Phineas and I am happy with you by my side but I’d be equally happy if Phillip can make your life even happier.  
And I have a feeling that it could be just that.”

They looked at each other and then hugged. Phineas gave Charity a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you so much for being my Rock and my lifeline”, he said. “Do you know the story about true mates?” 

“Phineas everyone knows that fairytale, of course I do. Do you think that you and Phillip could be that…. True mates?”, Charity didn’t even look shocked.  
If anyone would ever make a fairytale a true thing, it would be Phineas Taylor Barnum. 

“I think so… I’ve always felt this small.. electric charge between us. I thought I’d have imagined it since I thought he was an Alpha.. But with him being an omega.. it makes sense, doesn’t it? Charity… I was prepared to die for him when I went after him into that building. Even more so than for anyone else I could imagine in his situation”, Phineas said. 

“Well… You don’t know for sure, but once again, Phin. Go talk to him. I will go find Anne and the children so you can go talk in peace.”, Charity answered and smiled, excited for her husbands sake. He seemed already so entranced by the young man and she couldn’t even be upset about it. Phineas had long since struggled with happiness in his life. 

She remembered when he had tried to give her and the children a good life, moving from job to job and she never again wanted to see him struggle in his life like this.

Phineas looked at her once more before he hurried off to find Phillip, he looked like a man on a mission so no one dared to stop him. He found them in the center ring of the main tent.  
Anne saw Barnum coming and was already guiding the kids away from Phillip, who was showing them a new dance number he was planning for a special show.

Phineas stopped behind the stands in the shadows and watched on. Phillip had a huge smile on his face and was dancing and singing very enthusiastically. It put a smile on his own face. 

Phillip looked so very ethereal and beautiful, his hair in a slight disarray from dancing and probably combing his hands through it, it was like out of a dream and Phineas feared if he went into that ring, he’d never see this unreal vision before him ever again but lo and behold, Phillip seemed to feel that he was being watched since he turned around and faced the general direction in which Phineas stood.

Charity meanwhile sat down beside Anne on the stands, most of the Circus family has also moved into the main tent and was waiting in the shadows. 

Phineas stepped out of the shadows into the ring and slowly moved towards Phillip. They only had eyes for each other, seemingly in their own world.  
Like magnets they were pulled towards each other.

“Phillip Carlyle, never have I ever thought that this would become a reality..  
I’d only had wild dreams about you and when I saw you the very first time I was already mesmerized. I knew I had to have you any way I could…  
And when you joined this Circus, I felt like I could live with it. When you started your relationship with Anne Wheeler, I thought that I could live with it, being married myself..  
But when you told me what you told me today… I… Phillip Carlyle, I believe we are true mates ”, Phineas said and fell on his knees before the other man. 

His eyes open and his whole body vulnerable at the feet of the omega. Phillip was at a loss of words. He had always suspected that the bond between Phineas and him was… special. But the children’s fairytale true mates? That couldn’t be true.

With no other words spoken, he turned around and left the tent in a hurry. The cries of everyone in there following him out and just spurring him on to run faster.


End file.
